My Secret

Dear readers, I’m about to reveal something I’ve been shy to admit to just anyone. I’m deathly afraid of getting a pedicure. The sight of a nipper going in for my cuticles are enough to send me trembling. Seriously, it’s not funny. I love having clean, beautiful nails (Who doesn’t?!) and it’s really a big deal for me when I do go in for a nail treatment. Instead of getting relaxed with my pampering session, stressful siya for me! Kaloka. Nevertheless, I try to get regular nail treatments anyway (“tiis-ganda!”). Especially now that my precious back muscles are exhausted from all the baby-carrying, di ko na keri mag-bend down to do my own nails. So, being a mom now in her thirties, I thought it was high time to face my fear and appreciate this precious me-time activity somehow. I’m grateful too that I can actually find time nowadays to get a treatment, and a hubby who doesn’t mind when I do, and who would sometimes even join me (he loves spa treatments actually). What I did though is try several ones so I can at least find good, careful nail technicians who will understand and heed my constant call to, “be careful please!”

Here are two of my current favorites:

1.  Bamboo Nail Spa (G/F Strata Views Condominium, 306 P. Guevara St., San Juan. Tel no. 706-6280) – It’s a small nail spa that I serendipitously discovered as I brought in my baby for playtime with a friend’s baby nearby. The interiors are not very impressive but the service is. This is the least uncomfortable nail treatment I’ve had, with zero pain and really good, attentive service. Plus, they’re pretty affordable, too! (Classic Spa—foot soak, trim, massage, paint—is just P200!)

2.  Celebrity Nail Spa (Hotline: 0917-8120479) – Lately, it’s been pretty hectic what with balancing work and household and baby duties. There was barely time during the day to take a break let alone drive somewhere to get some treatment done. But my feet were too thick-skinned already, and it was crying out for a foot spa. So one night at 930pm, I tried my luck with this nail spa and asked if they were still open for services that night. And what do you know, they said yes! They were at my house 11pm. They were prompt, hygienic, the technician was friendly, accommodating yet not talkative, and gave an above-average treatment overall. I like that they offer an extensive lineup of services and they accommodate late-night requests (last call is 11pm), perfect for busy moms who can only take a break when the baby is asleep! (Mani, Pedi, Foot spa is P600)

Finally! Treatment's done. Phew!

The Verses of Motherhood

It’s been a write-less past couple of months with the onslaught of the holidays and a birthday trip (we just got back from Cebu) but that’s not to say it’s been Word-less. In fact, as I ponder on the past year and its gifts and lessons, I could easily point to motherhood as God’s avenue of choice that year to share with me and teach me several things. Here are some very important truths that have gotten me through the intense demands of motherhood and has enabled me to fully enjoy it and my son, so much so that I have forgotten the hardships now and am looking forward to getting pregnant again! (“Not yet please”, I could almost hear my husband say haha!)

If you cling to your life, you will lose it, and if you let your life go, you will save it. – Luke 17:33

There were moments when I was awake alone with my baby for the nth time during the night that I slumped in exhaustion and go into do-something-about-it mode. This is when I would count the number of times I have woken up, the total number of hours I haven’t slept. This would continue on to me reading up on other parenting styles and obsessing about sleep training and how and when my baby should be sleeping. I also carried my baby a lot simply because I really loved having him so close to me. But people always told me that I was setting him up for an ugly habit (“di na siya magpapababa”). God revealed to me then to not count what I had given, and what He would require from me. He would equip me with what’s needed of me so there's no need for me to force or control things. He would provide me with His abounding grace, and the sleep that my body needs. My only job is to give freely, in faith, to my child and family, just as freely I had received.

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. – Philippians 4:13

I was able to meet the demands of being a mom to a preemie, and have tried my best to be the wife that my husband needed more gracefully than I could ever have done on my own. My strength on a day-to-day basis was Christ. His grace had sustained me, his grace had enabled me.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. – Matthew 6:34

During the first few months, we had struggled with pumping and delivering milk to the hospital NICU for preemie Gabbie, then managing our new family without any helper whilst balancing work demands. It was challenging and there were really, really tough days where I couldn’t see beyond that day. And as I ended the day, I often wondered how I was able to get through that day, and how I’ll make it again tomorrow. This verse was my answer each and every time.

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. - 2 Corinthians 9:8

Looking back now, it seems so hard to believe that I used to pump milk every two hours round the clock, deliver to the NICU twice a day, then bring home and care for a three-pound tiny baby fearlessly, and without any household help. Then continue on to care for this little child until now, try to be the best wife I can be for my hubby, keep house (though we’ve now been blessed with a great household helper), and help out with our video production business. How? All through God who has blessed me so that I may have all I need to do good work each time, all the time!

The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, without painful toil for it. - Proverbs 10:22

Oh, this is so true! My little baby boy has brought so much joy and love and happiness to our lives that my heart expands each day in gratefulness. Oh, Lord, You have been so good to our family. Thank You for your blessings!

Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from him. - Psalm 127:3

Reward for what, I don’t exactly know but I am accepting this gift wholeheartedly and I will never stop thanking You Lord for the wonderful gift of Gabbie :) Now, as we tackle on the unique challenge of discipline with our now-15-month-old Gabbie, I keep this verse close to my heart, knowing that it is our God-given duty as well to guide our precious gift towards the right path.

What Manny Pacquiao Can Teach My Child

No, it’s not boxing (because my heart probably won’t be able to take it haha!), but something else that has been increasingly imminent in this man’s character. While the nation was in mourning at his latest, and most heart-wrenching loss, I too was dumbfounded at the way it happened. I mean, c’mon, Manny Pacquiao KO’d?! When I heard the news, I opted not to watch anymore because I know I’d probably weep like a baby. Pacquiao is as dear to me as he is to millions of Filipinos. Pinoys from all walks of life have been united in cheering for this man. Some even went so far as to declare him to be our national hero. That being said, his loss was taken not-so-lightly by his countrymen—some were deeply saddened as I was, some were sympathetic and encouraging, some were angry, and some chose to blame—from his Bible studies, his not hearing his usual mass the day before, his being over-generous (huh?), to Freddie Roach’s losing streak.

Amidst all the talk and the throwing of blame, one might wonder, how is Manny taking this all in? One statement that came from him answered it all,

“...Pwede ka bang pumunta sa larangan ng isang paligsahan na walang matatalo, puro panalo? Dumarating yung panahon na natalo ka, dumarating din yung panahon na nananalo ka. Kailangan pagdumating yung panahon na talo ka, buong puso mo ring tanggapin dahil pinasok mo yang trabaho na yan eh.” Karamihan kasi sa mga tao yung faith nila sa Panginoon ay pang good times lang. Peo pag bad times katulad ng nangyari sa akin yung faith nila nababawasan, at nawawala pa minsan.” Pero ako, lalong nadagdagan."

(Can you enter the world of competition and expect that you’d never lose and always win? Time will come when you would lose some, and you would win some. And when that time of loss arrives, you accept that wholeheartedly because you chose to enter that. A lot of people put their faith on God only in good times. But when bad times come like in my case, their faith diminishes, and sometimes wavers. But with me, my faith has just increased.)

-MANNY PACQUIAO

Image from guardian.co.uk

And immediately I was comforted by his words. I no longer felt pity for this man because he got knocked out in the ring. I felt joy for him because no matter what, he has God. And what can compare to that?

God in Manny Pacquiao’s life means boundless grace, peace and joy, as I can only imagine. And on the outside, God in his life has meant the return of a blissful marriage, freedom from the bondages of alcohol, gambling, and immense graciousness that is forming his character.

He lost the match but was quick to thank God that He has kept both he and Marquez safe inside the ring, offer his congratulatory greetings to the winner, and moved on with his life. No vents of anger, vows of revenge, cries of cheating, or traces of self-pity. This was a man who took it all like a man.

Manny’s legacy may always be as a great boxer, but in my mind, it’s increasingly becoming to be a man who completely surrendered himself to God. As the years pass and his experience adds up, what he may be able to teach the younger generation are far beyond what happens in the ring, rather, what a great God can do to an ordinary man like him.

What I admire most about Pacquiao ever since was his humility. He was not one to hide his vulnerabilities in the ring—kneeling down in prayer before a match as if putting it all in God’s hands. And isn’t that what we all need to do, whoever we may be, no matter what we have accomplished—to kneel down before a God infinitely higher and mightier than we are, acknowledge our limitations, and to rise up in faith as we put all of that, and our heart’s desires, all in His hands? When we do, I believe that God will also bless us with “long-sightedness”, or the ability to believe beyond what is in front of us (may that be loss, illness, or afflictions). Manny certainly seems to be looking way past that KO, so perhaps we should all take the cue from him J

Image from latino.foxnews.com

Personally, I’m just happy for the Pacman because he’s become so much more than just a boxer. He’s running the race marked out for him, and it’s showing in his character. And with his stature and influence, his life can be used by God to teach many. As Abraham was known for his faith, I believe Manny will also be the same. I know I’m eager to share stories about him to my son as Gabbie sure can learn or two about faith by his example. Perhaps even the whole country can, too J

Love Knows No Fear

As a new parent, I am aware of the incredible outpouring of emotions towards my son. The love that flows in my heart for him is constant and surging, free-flowing and seemingly boundless. When he was a small infant, soft, fragile, sweet, and in need of me, the love was just gushing out of me. Now at a year old, and a bit more feisty, playful and interactive, the love takes shape in various, more active forms—-through constant talking and communicating, through affectionate touch and embraces, and through discipline. At night when I put him to bed, I sing to him that I love him and that I always will, forever. And deep in my heart, I know that to be true, even when the time that he will go his own way will come, or even if he will disobey me, question my authority, or even dishonor me. I know that my love for him will never change. But I will admit to the fact that the thought of him hurting me, while possibly inevitable (I believe a person will go his own way and sometimes hurting others can’t be helped; I just pray that he will always be led by the Spirit in all that he chooses to fight for), is a bit stressful for me to think about right now haha! But never did it occur to me to give up the fight, to give up mothering, to give up on my family. Even if I knew for sure that Gabbie will give me a headache and heartache at some point, I will still choose to have him and take care of him and love him. Knowing this in my heart certainly puts things in perspective for me about my God. If I, imperfect to the core, can find such enduring love for my son, how much more our Creator who has given us Himself and had us call him, “Abba, Father” (Romans 8:15). And this IS, indeed, what His grace has given us.

I had been asked by a friend once, “If God is omniscient, then He must have known that we, His creation, would eventually sin and fall. Why, then, did He still choose to create us?” I believe it is because God wanted us to have a relationship with Him. He wanted us to know His love. He wanted us to know Him. (When we truly know Him, we will surely stand in faith, bringing Him glory as He had intended) But the price of that love was very high, yet God still chose to pay for it. Don’t you see? God has, and always will be, led by love. Love for you and I that endures the test of time, of trials and backsliding. “And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[b]neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. (Romans 8:38)”

By His grace, our sins have been removed from us and we have been given right standing with the Lord. The Lord Jesus Christ has given His own life so that we may have ours to the full (John 10:10). I remember how my life was without Him—full of darkness, lies, and fearful relationships. I did not know Him as my Father then. Then, He saved me. He brought me out to the light and gave me new hope. Everyday, He paints a fresh layer of my destiny. He gave me, a hopeless sinner, a brand new start. And by His grace, I am now able to claim the life and purpose He had intended for me. A glimpse of that are my wonderful husband and sweet baby boy. They are beautiful, glorious, and completely undeserved, much like my God, much like His love.

So, when I look at Gabbie now, and thoughts of future disobedience, insolence, stubbornness and other possible heartaches enter my mind, I lift up my head to God. I will not be fearful of having this relationship with my son or of loving him, for my Lord has shown me that love will indeed conquer all.

I love you, Gabbie.

Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13